Taking Control of Your Life February 20, 2007
Posted by The Probabilist in : [Articles], Consciousness, Personal Growth, Philosophy, Purpose, Relationships, Beliefs, Time , 4 comments
Life is undeniably a pretty complex term. When we look at all the different aspects of a human being’s life, what we are responsible for and what we can or can not control, the list can grow quite long and into many layers of details. Take for instance circumstances, emotions, skills, diseases, other people’s behaviour, luck, success and happiness. How many of these, and to what degree would you define to be within or beyond your control? An even greater question that I’ve been battling lately is the question of how much we as human beings are supposed to take control of in our reality in the first place.
Some books and teachings say that we should just let go of our desires, live simple lives and give up the thought of taking control of our destiny - that everything is going along just as it is meant to, which means that trying to alter things is futile and a waste of energy. In other words, life is meant to be a humbling experience where the solution is simply to enjoy our stay on this planet and live with care and love toward ourselves, others and the Oneness of all that exists.
Another way of thinking is that this whole reality is your own creation and you (read I) are fully responsible of all that goes on in it. Therefore, it’s obvious that there’s a lot of cleaning up to do with all the misery and catastrophes that occur every single hour and minute of every day. This revelation either breaks you if you don’t even have the strength to take care of yourself, or it has the power to create a great human being out of you that actively improves the world - through internal or external means (self-improvement or altruism).
Option 1 resembles more of a theistic approach and option 2 an atheistic approach, but it doesn’t have to be that cut and dried. The underlying question is if you have the full control of your reality or if it’s beyond your reach, found in something or someone else’s control. It’s all a paradox that seems to circle on endlessly when you think about the human levels of consciousness as explained by David Hawkins. In broad terms, people below the consciousness of 200 are denying the responsibility of their own life and need to grasp this revelation to reach neutrality. However, to get past the mid levels and reach unconditional love and enlightenment, you have to more or less again give up the control that your ego and corporeal body has access to. So what then is the answer, should a human being strive for control or not?
I wasn’t able to push this question forward until I started asking myself what the word control really means and comprises of. The traditional explanation would for instance consider having control of a car. It then means that you’re the master of the car’s movements and nobody else is able to influence it. This I would name ‘direct control’ and it follows in suit with the subjective reality perspective that everything is happening due to your own thoughts and actions - that circumstances, emotions, skills, diseases, other people’s behaviour, luck, success and happiness are all within your control.
However, I’m also convinced that ‘indirect control’ is an equally powerful concept and a very acceptable mind-set as well. This is the power of being a master at how you relate towards everything - even though you accept that everything is beyond your control. Your control is therefore strictly internal and in a way, you control the external occurrences because of your own relationships towards them. In this case for instance, cold weather does not have control over you because it does not bother you. You are in total acceptance of your surroundings and thus, you are the one in control. It’s still a kind of control after all even though the outcome is beyond your reach.
So what this all boils down to is a separation between internal and external control. Now if we look at the small list of concepts I presented earlier (circumstances, emotions, skills, diseases, other people’s behaviour, luck, success and happiness), we notice that all of them are within one of our ‘controls’ and that in the end, you don’t have to choose one form of control over the other. They can both co-exist and you just choose one according to the nature of the issue. I’m sure you’ll find out which concepts require direct control and which require indirect control.
Many people find themselves out of life balance when they only rely on one form of control. They get mad at the universe or themselves when there’s no single solution to all of their daily matters that they want to control. Fortunately, there is a solution for how to take control of life, but it takes time and effort to master both kinds of controls for improved life quality.
Or were you more inclined to find an answer to which of the two introduced teachings are more correct? Life isn’t a goal or a destination you strive to reach. It’s a path and an experience where there is no past and no future - only an endless amount of the present moment. Life wouldn’t be very exciting if all our questions were answered, but I hope that you start to recognize the two kinds of controls that you may use and slowly master from now on to make the best of your life and the present moment. This matters more to me than finding answers to all the questions I can think of.
(2 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
It’s Your Fault That You Feel Bad! February 14, 2007
Posted by The Probabilist in : [Articles], Consciousness, Emotions, Gratitude, Personal Growth, Psychology, Beliefs , 2 comments
It’s your fault that your inconsiderate boss irritates you. It’s your fault that you felt sad and abandoned when your girl/boyfriend left you. It’s your fault that you get angry in traffic jams. It’s your fault that you feel hurt about what others say to you. It’s your fault that you get depressed when you are diagnosed with cancer.
And yes, it’s all your fault that you feel offended and shocked about what you’re reading right now.
Nobody likes to get told that their thinking is wrong. Nobody likes to tell themselves that their thinking is wrong. And here I am doing exactly these two things in hopes that you break free from the internal chains of your own faulty mind. A snowball’s chance in hell, right?
It’s time for you to take control over your emotions. However, there is only one way of doing so and it starts with this revelation - that it’s your fault that you feel negative emotions inside of you. You want proof? The proof is inside you and it looks like you needed somebody to remind you of it. Yes, it’s time for you to stop playing the blame game and take full responsibility over what goes on inside your mind. And when you do so, the truth will set you free and give you unlimited power to create whatever state of mind you wish.
The first step is the most difficult one and it is exactly what I’m talking about here. Many people live their whole lives never truly getting it. Which means that you can consider yourself a very fortunate and happy person if you have already internalized what I want you to tell yourself.
Here’s the thing. No circumstance has the power to create, change, manipulate or control your emotions. No other human being has the power to create, change, manipulate or control your emotions. I can not control what you’re feeling right now, thousands of miles away in the form of digital bits that show up as a pixels on your screen that make up this text you’re reading. And neither can anyone you know either, no matter in what form they are communicating with you. If you think this statement is false, then you’re bound to live the life of a drone, walking around blaming the universe for your emotions. That doesn’t sound like a good fate for you now does it?
And oh my goodness what a liberating moment it is for you once you truly realize this!
Because the second and last step is simply choosing for yourself what kind of emotions you’ll start feeling. You are the unbeatable master of your own reality! You create, change, manipulate and control whatever you choose to feel. And if you’ve gone this far, I assume you’re a person smart enough to choose positive emotions from now on.
You realize how happy you are for not being as inconsiderate as your boss is. You feel good about your partner leaving you because it proves you that it wasn’t meant to be. You feel calm when you realize that you can’t control traffic. You understand that it’s your own level of self-esteem that defines how other people’s words affect you. You feel humbled about getting cancer because it teaches you to appreciate life and gives you the greatest challenge you’ve ever faced.
And yes, you feel good about what you’re reading right now because you internalize that I’m writing this to set you free - not to mock your thought patterns.
Are you still blaming external sources for what you feel or are you starting to realize how powerful your mind truly is in creating your own reality?
(4 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
