It’s Your Fault That You Feel Bad! February 14, 2007
Posted by The Probabilist in : [Articles], Consciousness, Emotions, Gratitude, Personal Growth, Psychology, Beliefs , 2 comments
It’s your fault that your inconsiderate boss irritates you. It’s your fault that you felt sad and abandoned when your girl/boyfriend left you. It’s your fault that you get angry in traffic jams. It’s your fault that you feel hurt about what others say to you. It’s your fault that you get depressed when you are diagnosed with cancer.
And yes, it’s all your fault that you feel offended and shocked about what you’re reading right now.
Nobody likes to get told that their thinking is wrong. Nobody likes to tell themselves that their thinking is wrong. And here I am doing exactly these two things in hopes that you break free from the internal chains of your own faulty mind. A snowball’s chance in hell, right?
It’s time for you to take control over your emotions. However, there is only one way of doing so and it starts with this revelation - that it’s your fault that you feel negative emotions inside of you. You want proof? The proof is inside you and it looks like you needed somebody to remind you of it. Yes, it’s time for you to stop playing the blame game and take full responsibility over what goes on inside your mind. And when you do so, the truth will set you free and give you unlimited power to create whatever state of mind you wish.
The first step is the most difficult one and it is exactly what I’m talking about here. Many people live their whole lives never truly getting it. Which means that you can consider yourself a very fortunate and happy person if you have already internalized what I want you to tell yourself.
Here’s the thing. No circumstance has the power to create, change, manipulate or control your emotions. No other human being has the power to create, change, manipulate or control your emotions. I can not control what you’re feeling right now, thousands of miles away in the form of digital bits that show up as a pixels on your screen that make up this text you’re reading. And neither can anyone you know either, no matter in what form they are communicating with you. If you think this statement is false, then you’re bound to live the life of a drone, walking around blaming the universe for your emotions. That doesn’t sound like a good fate for you now does it?
And oh my goodness what a liberating moment it is for you once you truly realize this!
Because the second and last step is simply choosing for yourself what kind of emotions you’ll start feeling. You are the unbeatable master of your own reality! You create, change, manipulate and control whatever you choose to feel. And if you’ve gone this far, I assume you’re a person smart enough to choose positive emotions from now on.
You realize how happy you are for not being as inconsiderate as your boss is. You feel good about your partner leaving you because it proves you that it wasn’t meant to be. You feel calm when you realize that you can’t control traffic. You understand that it’s your own level of self-esteem that defines how other people’s words affect you. You feel humbled about getting cancer because it teaches you to appreciate life and gives you the greatest challenge you’ve ever faced.
And yes, you feel good about what you’re reading right now because you internalize that I’m writing this to set you free - not to mock your thought patterns.
Are you still blaming external sources for what you feel or are you starting to realize how powerful your mind truly is in creating your own reality?
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Easier Doesn’t Make Things Easy February 11, 2007
Posted by The Probabilist in : [Articles], Consciousness, Goals, Personal Growth, Productivity, Beliefs, Abilities , add a comment
It’s time for a reality check. Or more of a perspective check. One of the biggest reasons people fail to push their personal growth up a notch is because they don’t seem to grasp what making their lives easier really means that they have to do - or how to relate to it.
All personal development is geared towards being at greater ease, doing things more easily or having things come to you more easily. But that basically never means that the path to get those things to happen to you is an easy one. And that’s why you need to have a more accurate perspective of what an easier solution to your problem or challenge is actually about. Many people fail to lose weight, make more money or improve their relationships because they seek easy fixes to their issues, when there truly aren’t any.
It makes me think of people competing in a race. Even the person that is at second place is doing worse than one of the competitors. And the person racing at next to last place is doing better than another one. This is the power of perspective that many fail to understand when trying to make improvements to their everyday life. They hear about a method that is supposed to be easier than what they’ve tried before, yet it still doesn’t seem easy for them to apply it.
Granted, the confusion often stems from poor advertising that states that a company’s or person’s solution is easy, not easier. Or quick when in fact it’s quicker. Or cheap when they mean it’s cheaper than their competitors’ products. It all also depends on what kind of a product, service or solution is provided. People don’t get very disappointed over small issues, but when it gets to emotionally and substantially more important issues like health, wealth, appearance, career and happiness, they get disappointed over self-improvement programs that promise easy routes when they never are. Sometimes the program and how it is presented is to blame. But when it comes to the consumers that fail to reach their goals (if they even have any), it’s because their mind-set and perspective is faulty to begin with.
Going back to the race analogy, in the first case, the person that is almost the best one of everyone competing will push himself even harder if and only if he thinks of himself as doing worse than the others, even though that he’s doing tremendously well in most of the other competitors’ eyes. He also understands that the leap he has to make in his own performance to improve his placement is incredibly much greater than for the person at next to last place to improve his.
On the other hand, the person sitting at next to last place needs to do much less in order to improve his placement. But the reason he isn’t is because he’s either complacent about his performance or doesn’t have faith in himself. He might also have the perspective that he’s doing better than the worst one competing, so it’s all good because of that. The biggest error is that he compares himself with people doing worse than him instead of those doing better than him - and this keeps him trapped. He may be constantly looking and buying into what he thinks are easy solutions that require little effort on his own part.
The bottom line is still that you have to think about your perspective. If you’re already performing say in the top 20 % of people in an area of your life, the going gets tougher and tougher to make even greater improvements and achievements. You’re bound to stagnate if you don’t remember that easier solutions don’t make them easy.
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