The Power of Doing It Once | The Probabilist . com

The Power of Doing It Once October 26, 2006

Posted by The Probabilist in : [Articles], Communication, Personal Growth, Productivity, Relationships, Time, Abilities , trackback

You’ve probably experienced the following two scenarios from time to time. The first one is that you notice someone doing something inefficiently and as a response to this impulse you tell them how it’s better done. Afterwards you wonder if that person now thinks of you as a smarty pants or a perfectionist. The second scenario is that due to the expected belief that this perception will occur, you refrain yourself from pointing out the issue in the first place. Naturally, you can experience these scenarios from both the giving and the receiving standpoint.

I’d like to challenge the very existence of the emotion that refrains some people from exercising the power of doing it once. Since the concept might still seem a bit foggy I’ll give you some very specific examples of what this is exactly about and how viewing it from different perspectives shows that it makes perfect sense to harness it. With this knowledge you can improve your attitudes and acceptance to people who are innately using it daily and gain a better trust in yourself to share it among others with greater ease.

For clarity’s sake imagine the following example. There’s a new employee where you work and this person’s time is often spent at a computer handling forms of some sort, which is somewhat new to the worker. You, having extensive experience and know-how on computers notice that he/she doesn’t use the tab key, Ctrl+ and Alt+ quick commands, right mouse button, num pad or whatnot. This is where you use a fraction of a second to choose to go for scenario one or two.

Now here’s the bottom line. It takes you five seconds to give that person a lifetime advantage! Sounds like exaggeration? I assure you it isn’t. Put your five seconds on one side of a scale and the sum total of time that the other person saves because of a single piece of advice you give and you get the big picture. This is the kind of perception that pushes the world forward. Don’t contemplate the possible unwelcome response or thought that other person might express.

Because of this simple example you might think “But I always do that”. Then what about more complex matters and what about people you don’t know that well? Depending on your personality you might go through the whole dyadic ’stranger to acquaintance to partner’ process with this person before stepping up to use the power of doing it once most efficiently. And by this I mean you do it every single time you see the opportunity even if it isn’t your specific task, role or obligation to educate or guide this specific person in this specific situation at this specific time or location.

When it comes to the more complex matters be sure that you really have something valuable to share. Let your experience and knowledge guide you, but don’t hold back if you’re uncertain. Take a more open approach. “Here’s something I was pondering…” or “Could this be done differently…” or “Have you considered…” are excellent starters for certain individuals, but remember that others like it direct, frank, logical and without the sugar coating.

The next step is to focus on reading that particular person both in advance and after you’ve presented your suggestion. Try an approach you think is the best suitable and try a different one later if that didn’t work out very well. When you’ve given the advice examine the response. If he/she isn’t overly expressive about it then ask directly their opinion. If you get a blank stare then explain briefly the power of doing it once. You might get the favor back sooner or later.

Given that you’ve perfectly understood this pattern you will easily harness it the other way around as well. Now that you are at the receiving end, no matter if the other person thinks in these terms, you can throw your resistance to new ideas and suggestions down the gutter before hearing a person out. You might not know how much effort someone is putting on expressing their suggestions on how you can improve yourself or what you do. Also, truly taking the time to listen completely to these views will guarantee you to receive more advice in the future.

Obviously, anything you say or hear has to make sense. If it doesn’t, it will automatically be discarded. But what also should be obvious is that your objective has to be to genuinely invaluate that person’s life. It’s not about showing who’s right. If not done in this fashion there’s no reason to expect it coming back in a similar fashion either.

You might start seeing these opportunities everywhere. It doesn’t matter if you’re exercising, grocery shopping, tying your shoelaces, paying your bills, driving your car, helping your kids do their homework, making dinner, cleaning your garage or going to sleep. There are lots of people throughout your day who can give or receive valuable gems of information if you just put your hands out and block your mind from making false initial judgments.